ech no other title just ech

I started writing some poetry – using different forms, this afternoon, but alas my brain was not wanting to go along for the ride, so the feeble attempt sits in my drafts folder.

I think I am slowly going out of my mind here with boredom – I know the signs, in fact you all probably know my signs by now, from past experiences.  I have been here before. When out of work, late last year, all was rosy in the first few weeks, though not physically going anywhere, it was like being on holiday.  I only wish my mind would  drift me onto a sandy beach with palm trees and a Mojito in hand, sadly it is not wanting too, nor are my finances.

It just held me captive staring at the computer for the longest time,  knowing that I could be writing something of substance, to while away the hours of my boredom, but in the end I couldn’t even manage that.

I looked up at the ceiling and silently screamed,  for it was a beautiful sunny afternoon and all I could muster was to mow the lawns (again). For the first time that I can remember I went and lay on the couch and I think I fell asleep for 20 minutes. That is not like me, I never have naps.

I woke, watched 3 episodes of Breaking Bad with Mr. S and have walked back into my study.  Sorry for the doom and gloomy contents of this post – just in a weird mood right now…but tomorrow is another day.

when the concrete cracks underfoot
my body sinks as does my mind
it vanishes in to the crevice from
the last day till the now and I
lose that in-between, the time
that spun now drags like hauling
heavy bags of clay
get to the end, so I can begin
get to the end, so I can start
get to the end, to stop myself
from slithering

20 thoughts on “ech no other title just ech

  1. I know the feeling. Boredom is our worst enemy and it feeds depression.
    Perhaps while you are looking for work you could do some volunteer work? Not sure if that’s your thing or not, for some it just isn’t and no judgment from me.
    You have a good speaking voice. Maybe you could volunteer to record for the blind? I remember seeing once that there are places where volunteers can record stories, magazine and news articles…
    You could…..join a group? Start a group! I saw the other day on gumtree a woman close to my area wanting to start a writers group.
    You could…. start a gardening project?
    Paint a room?
    Yeah I know….all money 😦
    Spring clean! Get organised! That costs nothing (And you might find some hidden stashes you’ve forgotten about? 🙂 )
    Go for a walk! Yes! That’ the best thing to break that feeling….There are negative ions in the great outdoors that are SO good for us, especially near water!
    You could….start a dog walking service!
    Pet minding? (I need one of those.)
    Go out and people watch – that’s always good for inspiration. 🙂
    Whatever you do, try to do one thing, even if it’s small EACH DAY that feels “productive”.

    • I looked for volunteer work today – nothing. I shall try tomorrow. I haven’t heard of doing the work for the blind – I shall look into that tomorrow too and thank you for what you said. You have brought a smile to my face with your list (especially the hidden stashes) I could spring clean…. though tomorrow hopefully I can get my business cards organised. Just seems strange getting them organised as I haven’t even commenced the new role and I think in a way that is scaring me a little, not knowing when, how, if. The days are flying past all too quickly.
      I mind dogs part time and have one now for 3 weeks, so I walk him every morning. I so wish I lived near the beach. Perhaps I need to go and have a coffee in an outside Cafe and people watch and write notes as you say. Thank you for trying to help hun I really do appreciate it – I know I get all forlorn when I am in this state of mind and need to snap out of it before it grabs too much of a hold.
      {Hugs for your kindness and your ideas} xx

      • Jen, what about the local nursing homes? They usually appreciate a hand with feeding residents at meal times. Unless laws have changed these days….
        Sorry, I do remember you mentioning dogs. Didn’t put two and two together that you already do some dog minding.
        It’s easy to get a bit down when you are at odds with yourself. Hope tomorrow is a better day!

      • Trace- I think the laws have changed now unless you have a Certificate III in Aged Care you can’t go near anyone. I shall make some enquiries though Thanks hun I hope today is better too xx

  2. Hi Jen! Sorry I haven’t been around much…I’m the opposite of bored….way too busy! I wish I had enough money to fly you to the States for a bit! I think I could keep you out of boredom’s way and we would have fun together! Have you done any funeral services yet?

    • Hi hun, I wish you could to – I am not the type of person to sit on my butt and not be occupied. 😦
      We would have fun – I could also enter the slug races 😉 No not yet, still waiting on final assessment to be given, that is why I am going slightly loopy. I do not want to get a part time job in an office, there is nothing else really around…I’m not very patient as you have gathered. xx

  3. I’ve been there myself…. though my couch is never comfy enough…. and slithering seems to always be invoved! 🙂

    In any regards I always prescribe two “Breaking Bad’s” and at least one “Boardwalk Empire” to help loosen the brain sludge. If malaise continues to be a problem then you will need to break out the big guns: an “I Love Lucy” marathon…. If you must insist on being productive, though, then open a “Mojito” stand on the sidewalk in front of your home. Even if business is bad you can still reap profits by drinking the inventory. And it’s a tax write off.

    But whenever you get to feeling really, horribly bored Jenn, and find your life slipping into complete ech, try remebering this: YOU LIVE IN AUSTRALIA! QUIT COMPLAINING! 🙂 Or come visit us where 270 channels are just as freaking boring…. They just don’t have the lovely accent…. that’s a sure bonus….

    • We have just finished Boardwalk Empire 🙂 I couldn’t really get into it as much as the better half did. I love Lucy – oh good heavens we are showing our age 😉 Thank you for your kind words and you made me laugh at ‘living here so stop complaining’ … perhaps another walk in the Aussie sun this afternoon, some more weeding with the garden (ech) will help pass the day…followed of course with a Mojito or a wine..scotch…gin..brandy…
      🙂 Thanks John

    • It sucks doesn’t it, the next morning waking to say…oh no another day of this to face… I have to stop whinging or everyone will get tired of me carrying-on..yesterday was just the pits 😦 thank you hun xxx

  4. Hi RM, boredom, it sucks, not something i look forward to.
    Would you consider writing a poetic narrative with me, would that interest you?
    Probably fantasy? Well make believe anyway…..

  5. No – and I wish you well with that… it does suck the life from you, there is only so much, writing, reading, TV watching, walking and gardening one can do…
    Yes of course I would be interested. Lead the way my friend 🙂

  6. every person needs to feel vital and that they are contributing to the world in some way. you contribute something to us everyday with your gift of words, i’m sure you have no idea how many people you actually touch. to add to that, i hope you take your place in the world soon where you can be rewarded financially for your empathy and passionate approach to life, it’s right around the corner –

    • Beth you say the kindest things and I am so very, very appreciative that you feel this way about my writing. I have to simple try and be patient.. which is not in me… but hopefully soon I can commence – thank you for listening to my whinging and also my words. It means a great deal to me to know that I contribute n some small way to the lives of others. {hugs} xx

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