Is that a gun in your pocket?

Today hmm how shall I describe my day?

For the next 2 weeks or possibly more I am working at Mr. S’ work, well not at his work,  but for his employer. I have worked there once before, inside the office, this position however is calling on customers and taking their orders for the products Mr. S’s company sells.

You will all understand why I will not and cannot mention the company when I tell you about my 2nd visit. Let us just say I am calling on various Supermarkets.

First one went fine, small shop, not a big order. I went up and down the aisles, checking what stock they had of ours and if they needed to bump up their stock.

Second shop…this is where… well okay the only way to say this is to well..say it.

I walked in and asked for “whathisface”, “whatshisface” was not there, so another young man, possibly late 20’s at that,  came to my assistance.

I had a clipboard and order sheet and catalogue in hand. He had his copy of the catalogue in his hand.

The first aisle we walked up and down, he being polite,  asking me how my Christmas was and New Year, to which I told him, I ate too much. His reply polite “You don’t look as if you have to worry about anything”. I also advised him I was just relieving staff, until a new Rep was appointed. His reply “They don’t need a new Rep, you can just come here”.

How sweet, okay not here really for social chit chat, anyhow, he had to look up on the top of the shelves to check some boxes out of stock, so he went to retrieve a ladder from the back store-room.

Back he walked ladder by his side and well it was a case of “Is that a gun in your pocket or are you pleased to see me”. I swear I don’t normally look down to that department, but it was more than obvious!! *Nods* and since we don’t tote guns over here, then I could only assume, he was VERY pleased to see me.

I averted my eyes from the obvious, he went up the ladder, came down the ladder. We walked to the next aisle, and for the sake of a name let’s call it – “Jeffrey” followed (for gawds sake man, can’t you train it?)

“Jeffrey” continued saying a high and mighty HELLO to me up and down the aisles, but the most disconcerting and evasive was each stop at each product we had to check, “Jeffrey’s owner” stood right up close and personal and made sure “Jeffrey” was touching my leg. (Thankfully I had pants on).

Now what do I do in these circumstances? The mother side of me just wanted to slap “Jeffrey” back down into place and say really…you think this is professional? The other part of me said I am helping out the company, I can’t do anything to jeopardise future relationships with the customer.

So “Jeffrey” and his owner continued to follow me, stand behind me, to the side of me, nudging at every given opportunity, which there were many!   Ewww gross I know.

I think the owner of “Jeffrey” was perhaps a little…. well to put it as politely as I can, a sandwich short of a loaf in some aspects, as when his “Jeffrey” was touching me, he kept looking down as if to see my reaction, waiting for me to get either a) excited b) be disgusted.

I was neither, I carried on as if nothing was happening and believe me it wasn’t easy.
Thankfully after a very long hour of this, I shook his hand at the door and said thank you for the order and left.

How would you have handled this situation?

I would be interested to know.

Mr. S is understandably mortified, so are the owners of the business, I mean to say on my first day to be confronted by Jeffrey. The owners will be contacted and a meeting will be set up. I hate to think this guys job is on the line….but…..

This is how I felt with my “Jeffrey” encounter
(yes I chortled at the pic I chose & psychologically I’m okay and the wine is already opened!)

63 thoughts on “Is that a gun in your pocket?

  1. I would have grabbed Jeffrey, very forcefully, pushed Jeffrey’s owner up against the shelves, begun salivating and telling him how much you LOVED to inflict pain on little boys and how the last one was still recovering from jaw surgery from when you used a ball-gag that was one size too big (*oopsie!*) and how unfortunate it was that he was able to twist out of the grips of your friends Helga, Olaf and Hortense, and how Helga, the poor dear, was still heart-broken over the loss of her favorite leash-and-collar set, given Jeffrey one more SOLID twist, made your face go all serial-killer cold and then said, as if nothing had happened, “What’s next on the list?”

    But then, I am a guy after all, and that strategy could just as easily back-fire on you, so, Jeez, I really don’t know. I probably would have just kneed him in the groin and left.

    But I don’t have issues….really….I swear. 😉

    • Hell why weren’t you with me JCC??? I am in hysterics with your response – so thank you! In fact I keep looking up and reading and burst into laughter each time. 🙂 It was soooo tempting to do all of the above – believe me 😉 Thanks JCC for commenting and making me giggle.

  2. Oh! I can answer this! Some weirdo tried that stunt on me in a checkout line, his friend “Jeffrey” suffered a bit of trauma when my purse somehow slammed “Jeffrey” and his two buddies. I apologized profusely of course. Not.

    In that situation though? I don’t know, more than likely I would have given him a warning to knock it off before I knocked him out. You probably handled it a lot more professionally than I would have. What a horrible experience, that dude deserves to lose his job. I highly doubt you’re the first one he’d done it too since he seemed to be judging for reaction. Do not hate that he could lose his job, he never should have put you in that position to begin with. xx

    • I am loving the responses – slamming Jeffrey with your purse OMG priceless. I don’t think I really had a choice, if I was able to get away and phone Mr. S I am sure he would have said get the hell out of there. To think there were other customers in the shop too…. I do feel terrible that he will and he will, but he should of thought of the consequences of Jeffrey’s actions… thanks honey, tomorrow more stores, thankfully I’m a big girl and have not been traumatised by the ordeal 🙂 xxx

  3. Jenny that picture is hilarious but I feel for you as I have been propositioned in some quite disturbing ways over the years. I never know what to do and probably would have done as you had done

  4. LOL, Jen. This truly is a case of “wash your hands Jeffrey, with the Solvol Jeffrey” – if you remember that ad. This is very funny and I don’t mean to laugh at your expense, but perhaps you could have led him to the toiletry aisle, reached for the Panadol and told him not now and not ever, you have a headache :).

    • Oh Jude, it is funny and that is the only way I could write it without saying ‘woah is me’. It was an experience… and yes I so do remember the ad, perhaps sub consciously that was in my head when I named IT Jeffrey! Eww at the thought…definitely headache material, I’m sorry to say. xx

  5. Oh lord. What a whack job. Ooops! Did I just say that? I think you handled it the right way and yes, I think he deserves to lose his job -sexual harassment is no joke. I once had a former colleague try to give me a New Year’s “kiss” by shoving his tongue in my mouth. I bit it. He never talked to me again or even acted as if I existed. He was fired a few months later for harassing someone else. 🙂

  6. I read everyone’s answers and guess I am the more direct type. I have had something similar happen to me and on the spot I addressed it. When you first noticed it, I would have ignored the problem. But the moment he gets that close to me (and there is no reason for him to be that close) and felt it on my leg, I would have spun around and calmly told him to back off. I don’t care who I am working for, it is my right and he cannot just do that to anyone. I bet if you ask some of the employees there they would have similar stories. I would have set him straight and let him know I would be reporting him. Then leave. 🙂 But that is just me.

    • I think I gathered 🙂 everyone handles this dilemma in different ways. I think I was too shell shocked to be honest, not wanting to upset any future relationships with the customer, I chose the keep cool, professional approach. Perhaps it seems whimpy, but the situation will be addressed and he will lose his position. As I wrote, if I was younger I probably would have flattened him! 🙂

      • I would be calm, professional and tell him to stop kinda way and did do that before. Flattered? lol I don’t think I was ever flattered by that at work. I am a big meanie 🙂

  7. oh, jen what an awful experience. don’t feel bad about him and his job, by doing what you’re doing, you may be saving others from jeffrey and his owner. I’m sure he’s done this before and will again, sadly, wherever he may end up. i loved your choice of pics too. i don’t know what i would have done, i know what i would have liked to have done, though. it involves the ladder and maybe a little ‘accident’ )?

    • It was a tad more then disturbing, though I think Jeffrey’s owner was possibly a bit himself, unfortunately. Apparently he has, to another Rep but no touching was involved. The pic is quite priceless. It’s funny in a way yet terribly sad and I know he will lose his job over it. The ladder…see I wasn’t thinking too well, could have worked. Mr. S took all the details last night to have the meeting. Today I’m out on the road again, fingers crossed all will be well 🙂 x

  8. Jen, that pic you chose seems so perfectly chosen, you being uncomfortably smothered in the wholly inappropriate behavior of this stranger. his boldness tells me this was not the first time he has done this, he deserves to lose his position so that no one else is subjected to his perversion. good on you for reporting it, i’m sorry it happened to you.

    • Hello my friend, no it wasn’t the first time as I have found out. Very brazen or very disturbed, I can’t figure out which. Will see what the meeting brings, thank you, no though I have made light of it (because there wasn’t really another way) it was a very unpleasant experience. Thankfully my rounds today were uneventful ` thank you ‘ (hugs)

  9. Geez, Jen…what an unfortunate experience with junior and his johnson. I’m not surprised by the way you handled it…professional; class act. Since junior wanted a reaction from you it was the perfect way to handle it…as if it was just another day with another johnson. I’ve had similar situations 3 different times in my professional life. Each time I handled it differently. You never know how you will react until it happens. For a while you are thinking…is this really happening right now? Ugh. Gross.

    • *Nods* I am surprised how many other ladies have experienced this type of ‘behaviour’ ~ I think this is all that I could have done, otherwise I would have face planted him. Yes it was gross – major gross 😦 xx

  10. H.O.T. Mama!
    I’m afraid I might have wanted to react like the mother in you considered but on the other hand, had he stood that close (too close), I might have said something rude. I have a low tolerance for crap.

  11. Well when I was young and so very long ago I think most young men would just be embarrassed by the lack of control they actually had over their body parts but then I grew upturned 22 and climbed into a rig where I was a very young blonde and no one messed with me, lol blue eyes, blonde hair and chest to complete the package so maybe just maybe he found you attractive and lost all sense of his common sense, though most that age these days have NONE.

    The part that gets awful is the brushing up against you now that goes beyond dumb ass male stuff, it is sexual harassment and is punishable by law. Not sure what they do in your country but here where I live if you are a sexual predator you must check in with each police department as you move from town to town. I am sorry he chose you to get his perverse pleasures with 😦

    Be careful out there helping out and use the clipboard the next time 🙂

    • Hi sweety – I don;t know if he will be charged – I guess I could press charges, but I’m only working 2 days a week for 2 weeks here, so I don’t think I will. If he loses his job which he will, then I guess that is the best outcome. Yes, lack of control was his issue and perhaps not mentally stable. Thank you hun, it was a little more then ‘ewww’ ~ today was fine no clipboard hitting required 🙂 hugs E. xx

  12. LOL! You’re nicer than me. As flattering as it may have been for “Jeffrey” to put in an appearance, allowing him to poke at me would have been past my personal space boundaries. I would probably have asked him to stop poking me. 😉

  13. What we want to do and what we do are often so different. Sexual assault is very unpleasant. We are often shocked enough that we try to ignore, push aside or not make a scene. This fellow has obviously done this often, he is easy to profile. I would suspect he is a bully to other employees there. I would not be surprised if he has done much more too as he is obviously very self centered.

    What to do? at the time we want to be polite, Why should we though, we are being assaulted, but this is our reaction. So perhaps start easy, a quiet excuse me I have a phobia about personal space, I am sure you understand, even a gentle push back. It could even be followed with an.. I am sure this won’t be an issue will it?

    Following this a sharp rap with the edge of the clip board would be a stronger reminder, with out creating too much of a scene. A stern look too.

    Introducing Mr Happies nutty friends to your knee works wonders too. Then, however, things have escalated. Unfortunately this often happens.

  14. Oh Jen, you had me in fits and then saying yuck! all at the same time. I’ve had some experience with a few awful Jeffreys purposely pressing up behind me in a very crowded bus when I was growing up. Most of them were happily greeted with an elbow or school bag. Some were ignored, just like you. No reaction whatsoever and that I understood to be the better way to communicate my disgust towards these attention seekers who deserved nothing but my knee, rather than my backpack or elbow. I needed to wash my elbow actually. I didn’t have hand sanitizer back then – pfffttt.
    That photo is just perfect.

    • Again you have been another victim, what is with these men? Sorry you have experienced it, as has Beck. It’s not pleasant and something that spoiled the day. Thankfully today was calm and no incidents to report. Hugssss xx

  15. i think i would have flipped out a knife…to clean your nails….a very big knife…
    and start talking about how you cut the sausage into really small parts
    when you make jambalaya…how you hate when the knife gets dull and catches on the skin casing…
    bet jeffrey deflates pretty quick…

    thats just me though…ha

    • I am cracking up here at your response! Poor Jeffrey dismembered into a Jambalya… then again… has merit 😉 eh wouldn’t want you any other way B ~ thanks for your input, hopefully it won’t happen next week or the knife will come out! ~ smiles

  16. As a man (ME) I would have asked him out for a date, not shown up, but then beat him up when he left alone..
    You did ask 😦

    Sorry, I am Scottish..


      • Oh it is Ewwwww..Had I been in your shoes, or similar shoes, I guess I would have to had played it clever. But I would have been STRUGGLING 😀 So well done you..

        LOL x

      • You could have knocked him off the ladder and what could he do? Jeff and little Jeff on the ground there for all to see..

        Yeah I would have swiped the Ladder 😦
        Am I a bad person?

  17. Aw, Jen, what an awful position to be put in. Some people! It’s such an awkward situation. As you say, you’re trying to be professional and handle it in a way that doesn’t compromise business relations. But it is also one of those occasions where you are completely taken aback and almost can’t believe it’s happening. I’ve had something similar happen and, before it happened, I thought I was being paranoid about being followed in broad daylight. And yet, something ‘felt’ uncomfortable. But there is an element of thinking, ‘No, this can’t be happening. Don’t make a fuss’. Almost as if the embarrassment would be yours. At least that’s what I felt like. He deserves all he gets, Jen. Even if he has ‘disturbance’ issues, He really shouldn’t be working in a place where he obviously can put women into this position and, not only has no self-control, but appears to relish his behaviour and the reaction he may elicit. It’s not on.
    I think your reaction was completely understandable. After the fact we may wish and think, ‘if only I’d done or said’ but when the moment is occurring it is difficult to know exactly what to do.
    I hope the rest of your time on visits goes smoothly. x

    • Thanks sweet – how many women actually have experienced something similar just from my readers astounds me. The next day the visit were fine. The meeting was held the HR Manager and the owner of the company went in to speak to ‘his’ Manager and naturally the Manager was horrified. Apparently Jeffrey’s owner has had issues for some years… I was asked if I want to press charges – but I am saying no I won’t, on the proviso that he seeks help. It wasn’t right, it was ‘creepy’ and uncalled for, but I realised he needs help and me dragging him through a Court won’t fix him. 😦 x

You have spent the time popping in - Please don't waste it - share a comment on what you have read.

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s