Once you were there


We say goodbye to many things
from the little to the large
in days that pass

from empty plates, abandoned glasses
on the sink, knives, forks
shut in drawers

wave to silver birds taking to the sky
wheels in car parks, we
hold tickets to escape

conversations end, time again
is ours, click telephone
receivers, ears warm

unconditional love givers
who once greeted, wagging tails
leads and empty bowls

notes to dance with, silence overtakes
tunes faintly linger
in our heads

flavours in our mouths. sour, sweet
savoury, a moment on tongues
that dissolve

spring, summer, autumn, winter
seasons drift unconsciously
one to the next

the last word of love is goodbye
hearts crushed when two
become one

arms around bent shoulders
words of love, our last goodbye
flowers draped on pine

©jmtacken 28/3/2014

Tony at http://dversepoets.com has us creating blank verse, that is verse which does not rhyme, but with rhythm . Let’s see if this belongs.

37 thoughts on “Once you were there

  1. saying goodbye is def never easy…and part of love at times is in the letting go as well….i like the rather misdirect last line in this…sad too how things change…life is learning to let go…hopefully not so much in having to let go love, but it is there for sure…far too often…like how some words play together in this…(dance with/silence—similar sounds) like the touch to the senses as well…

    • Thank you B, I’m happy that certain words, lines stood out to you. No, goodbye at any time is not easy, I’d rather be able to say ‘See you late’ than goodbye. Thank you for commenting ~ smiles

  2. I really liked the flow… it was touching and it cascaded into the rites of sadness which is sweet. Goodbye is a word we wave around throughout our lives… everything is transitory after all but for the feelings that remain somewhere… which is not seen. 🙂
    Lovely writing. 🙂

    • Thank you anmol, I have much to learn, I read it out loud and didn’t know about the therm even then. So true, it’s a simple word bandied about at times, we don’t know what feelings are felt when it is spoken. Thank you for commenting. 🙂

  3. Lovely cadence as I read it aloud ~ How sad though for someone to be left alone in the end ~ Goodbyes are hard, just like the seasons, life flows in and out ~

    Happy weekend to you ~

    • Thank you very much Grace, I do find it remarkable how it can take on a different feel when when out loud. Being left alone, can be a tough pill to swallow. Thank you for commenting, thank you and I hope you have a lovely weekend also. x

  4. This is really amazing and definitely has a rhythm to it. I think goodbyes are the hardest, saddest parts of life. I suppose, though, some goodbyes are positive- like saying goodbye to a bad partner or habit!
    As a teacher, when I read your work, I always imagine it in a textbook. You’re so talented–you need to be hugely published!

    • You have made me smile about hugely published, there are so many talented poets out there, I don’t think I would rate amongst the majority of them, but perhaps an EPub like my book. Yes some goodbyes and perhaps a good riddance at the end are said, but others can be devastating. Thank you lovely for your kindness. x

  5. What an accurate description of how in little ways we are reminded of someone gone in our day to day lives….goodbye to the forks and knives…saddest part of living, yet the good has to come to mind for us to survive

  6. what a wonderful slow.. I could almost hear the gentle trickling of tears to that goodbye… with flowers draped.. at first I where not sure the nature of the goodbye,, but yes I know you see this a lot so yes.. I do understand.

  7. It flows beautifully, Jen. Sad but very much part of life in so many ways as your words remind us.
    My stomach gave a little lurch when I saw the large ‘Goodbye’ sign. I thought something awful had happened and you were leaving. That would be a very difficult goodbye too. Hope all is well.x

    • Hello sweet, I hadn’t written for a week, too exhausted with taking on another job, but I’m sure I will get used to it, I have to. No lovely I’m not saying goodbye, but rather just slowing down a bit, hence I don’t get around to reading or commenting on other posts that much. If I hit your like button, it means I have read, just haven’t the strength to write something intelligent for a reply 😦 thank you xx

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