Havin a chat – Legs – Chapter 2

So here I am again. I do hope for the whole 11 readers of Chapter 1 that I didn’t shock you too much.

Today students we move on from feet to legs. Let me show you an example (as I did with the feet in chapter 1). The below BELIEVE IT NOT we’re how my legs looked.


Now at the age of 60 ..not so much.

Naturally skin has thinned, think about tissue paper and you’ll get the idea. One slight knock, no matter how small or light will more than likely cause a bruise. I think of pops hands and how bruised they are… That can be my legs. Sooooo I am very careful walking around furniture, stepping out of the shower, or doing anything where I may knock myself.

Then of course we have the gravity issue, what normally was up sadly must go down. When I taught aerobics many moons ago, my thighs actually didn’t meet…you know where. I thought I was the ants pants, as that was THE look. Now after hibernating for winter, comfort eating, this little wombats thighs have reintroduced themselves. To be honest though they have been that way for a while now and they have decided to take the plunge southward.

Again I SIGH.

Next are the knee caps, same deal, skin that once was taut, now folds over, similar to my bottom lip when I look at them.

The final part of this ever enthralling chapter is hair. Oh yes the bane of all women. When I was younger out came the soap ( yes soap because back then I believed shaving cream was just for men) even though I was shaving…derr. Gradually I learnt women can also use shaving cream or gel and I was quietly thrilled.

After many years of shaving, I decided to try waxing. Buying wax strips, or pots of wax that was microwave heated, the pain and mess would begin. Wipe on..wipe off. Too complicated, too fiddly…NEXT?!

Out came the Eepilady. A small little electrical unit, that has quite a few inbuilt tweezers. Now at first go, it feels as it sounds, lots of little tweezers pulling out the hair by the roots. After the initial swearing it isn’t that bad. From bikini line (there’s LOTS of swearing and face pulling there) to the ankles, I zip away. The good thing about this form of hair removal is that the hair grows sparser and comes through finer, so after years of  subjecting myself to the agony, I don’t wear the mohair stockings, nor do I have to contemplate the lawnmower.

Speaking of stockings, if only I could wear them every day, as they work wonders keeping all the wobbly bits in place. Thankfully, I only have a few small veins, but nothing too worrying, something has to go right…right?

Now I’m not quite sure if the bum should be in this chapter, or the next, I don’t have a lot to tell about my derriere. It’s probably the same as most, though many years back when I was painting our kitchen ceiling and standing on a stool, I missed my footing to get to the bench and fell fair square on my right cheek (bottom that is) . This resulted in a huge bruise and weirdly enough after time a dint, think moon crater.

Thankfully I was able to get this fixed down the track. That will be in my next chapter,  I have to keep you in suspense and wanting more….somehow.

Keep on loofering ladies !

35 thoughts on “Havin a chat – Legs – Chapter 2

  1. I am snorting, (sorry!) misery must love company! I have held onto bruises since my 30’s, wish not but true. Annually my daughters “inspect” damage, dry skin and weird brown “freckles” while at beach or pool. They FEAR the results if aging on my bidy, realizing they are Next! Part if my suggestions are too late for them since they, like me, enjoy sunshine. ♡ We have used sunscreen since 1995 or so. Too late. Anyway, I have been using a shaver with no water or soap. Dry shaving the wispy legs and facial hair since 40. Ta daa!! Sane boat, Jen. Age is not for sissies as so often repeated on the Internet xoxo

    • I love snorters! Oh the freckles yes, sun asking takes it toll doesn’t it and I was a baking baby too, out on the concrete covered in coconut oil… Oh dear the things we did. A shave with no soap or water?? Don’t you nick yourself? Lol ah yes ..I’m yet to get to the face chapter. Good on you girl for putting it out there. You are SO right it’s not for sissies, stand tall, stand proud. 😃 xxx

      • This was a lot of fun! My friend Nancy says using a dry razor is like using a lawn mower trims but doesn’t get so close it cuts. Peach fuzz! 🙂
        We never call those freckles “age spots” either! I try to exfoliate to get old skin to “Go Away!” No such luck, Jen 😦
        On a more serious subject- – how was your Service, Jen? ♡

      • Thank you darling. 😊 Oh I don’t know if I can handle a dry razor, especially with my dry skin, that is more akin to a reptiles!
        Service went really well thank you for asking, I did two last week and I have two on Monday. I’ve been busy & still am on this beautiful warm weekend, writing. Hope you’re having a lovely weekend. ❤️ X

      • I am happy to hear things went well with your service. I feel two in one week is plenty amount but two in one day would overwhelm me! Wishing you peaceful moments and sips of wine to relax. You deserve to out your feet up or cuddle. . . 🙂

  2. Oh to have those legs! Never did – never will – hopefully I have something different to offer that has merits – but definitely not those gorgeous legs! 🙂 Oh what fun aging is – LOL!

  3. Now Jen your legs are not so bad…you have two still be grateful and after all my dear you are a youthful 60 and some things are just gonna go on ya……though I don’t envy the pain and anguish let alone the expletives you have uttered over the years maintaining that youthful leggy beauty.
    Can’t wait for the next one, bums eh? Bring em on cheeky….lol

  4. Eeeeeps is your next post going to be cheeky?

    Waxing is fun. Nods lots. Grimaces.

    Cooler weather is coming. Woot tights and other assorted hosery torture. Ugh. There needs to be manufacturing rules… or something.

    Hey don’t bump into things.

    • No I don’t think so, maybe a little tee hee. Have been so busy haven’t begun to write it yet. Waxing..nods at your grimacing. I smiled at your hosiery torture. I don’t mind rugging up in tights, covers up a multitude of not so attractive things. Lol. I’ll try not to bump 😘

  5. *giggle* *gasp* *giggle* Oh my tummy hurts.
    Waxing is awful but I do it, as many places as I can reach..pffft, Um, your epilady sounds like torture…
    I bruise easily and hate carting around purple hued things that take ages to disappear.. ugh my legs are flabby what nots even with yoga and running.
    Wait, your next post is about bottoms? ooooh you know I’ve lots to say. Bottoms are my favorite topic. How did I miss your first one?

    • I’m glad you chuckled, you need to do that more 😉The epilady is a modern torture machine, but once you start, it doesn’t become that painful and hair is more sparce and finer..so all good. I have flabby inners, I walk but that’s it! Smiling at your love of bottoms too. I don’t know young lady how did you miss it? It’s still there but not the most attractive post 😞 xx ❤️

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