The day has arrived..580th post and proud of my Pop!

The day has arrived, well yesterday actually.

I took Pop to buy a scooter (sorry Max – it was now or never)  – as the car was sold last week. He settled on a 2nd hand one (2 years old) and after today’s first ‘test-drive’ I am so glad he didn’t pay for a new one at $4000.00. This was just over half that price.

See in the 1st picture the smile – the look of happiness, as we set the speed to turtle (5kph) to get out of the driveway. It can ramp up to the hare which is 12kph….I know what a hoon.

Down the street we went, with me trying to keep up in my heeled boots. (Possibly not the best chosen footwear for the test run).  We arrived at the main road to cross, dad had to pull in next to the traffic light, so he could press the button.

OOOOOps – “Yes dad you take your hands off for it to stop. Ok a little bright blue nail polish – no one will even notice the chips…honestly”. We got to the other side, followed the scooter/wheel-chair friendly path that came to an end with a gutter and not a ramp..”Oh dear back it up Pop, don’t think you are quite ready for that”.

He reversed, but then decided some 4 wheel driving must be in order as off he went in another direction.  “Pop, (yelled I) no love, you can’t go onto the roads with these, you have to do a u-turn and we go back the other way”. “Hmm what’s that,  you can’t turn it around, hop off then”.

On I got flag flying proudly in the breeze and turned it around. Mission accomplished – off we went. Pop turns into the driveway to the strip shopping centre. “No Pop, you can’t drive in the middle of the road, you’re not in your car now, keep to the left like you’re a pedestrian”. (patience..breathe). Oh look a very narrow ramp that you possibly may be able to get up in order to get to the supermarket. “Up..no…up…no.. Turn dad, reverse dad, no not now a car is coming,  wait, now reverse, stop, forward, back”. STUCK.  😦 Kindly knight (without the shining armour) alighted from his car after seeing the trouble  I we were in and lifted the back wheel over the gutter. “Phew thank you so much”.

Into the small supermarket… not only small but almost every aisle was an obstacle course of wire square bins with grocery items for sale, or the blessed pyramid of coffee tins, just begging for a L plated scooter driver to run into. “You have got to be kidding me” (the wolf had nothing on my huffing and puffing). “Where’s the Manager”. Yes,  I was hot, bothered and patience – I had none.

“Excuse me, but this is the most unfriendly supermarket for wheelchair access or scooters for the elderly”.

“It’s a small store, we have to make do”.

“So you make do by filling the aisles with objects, that they need a rally car license in order to navigate?”

He shrugged.

I was getting angrier. “Come on dad, time for home”.

Off we went, dad taking the long way round to get back to the exit, with cars driving slowly behind him, as he still thought he was in a car and not a scooter. Cross the main road (luckily without any incident or need for more nail polish).

“Dad can you put it on tortoise”?

“It’s only doing 5kph”.

“Yes, but I have boots on not runners”.

We arrived home, safe in body but possibly not sound in mind.

More practice I am sure…that’s all he needs…  clearer aisles oh and 10/10 for giving it a go my darling!

This is the Lady – My Mum

Mum

I have written about my Pop but not Mum…so it’s her turn tonight.

This is the English Rose at my daughters Wedding 3 years ago.

This is the lady who says now she’s not beautiful & that growing old means people “look at you as though you are stupid or they don’t understand you, or have patience for you”.

This is the lady who gets frustrated by not being able to do what she did in her younger years.

This is the lady who suffered a fall a couple of years ago and now has difficulty walking (one of my little penguins).

BUT  This is the lady that brought me into this world.

This is the lady who held my hand to cross the roads.

This is the lady that looked after my children, so I could work.

This is the lady that took care of me when I was sick, or had a bad back & couldn’t tend to my daughter.

This is the lady who has supported me and my family with her unconditional love & affection.

This is the lady whom I have laughed with and shared tears with.

This is the lady that I have argued with & fought with.

This is lady who can say a sharp word or two to me if she feels the need.

This is the lady who has shared so much love for other people.

This is the lady that has such a good and giving soul.

This is the lady I look up to & admire for her strength & her courage to leave her home of England and come to Australia for a better life, knowing that breaking away from her parents was the hardest thing she could do.

This is the lady who has shown so much commitment and unquestionable love to my father.

This is the woman that lays Pops clothes on the bed of what he is to wear every day and continues to do so, because she thinks he can’t colour coordinate (though everything is beige) 🙂

This is the lady who bares no grudges towards anybody.

This is a lady who was told she should start her own cake business as she is a brilliant cook.

This is a lady who held ‘simple’ dinner parties for 20 people without blinking an eye.

This is the lady that was a brilliant hostess.

This is a lady that went back to work, standing on a cold concrete factory floor to work on a production line so that she could save some extra money to take my brother to England for a visit to see his Grandparents.

This is the lady that will have glassy eyes when helping Pop up from his chair.

This is the lady who lost her youngest son eight years ago and bares the grief silently within her heart.

This is the lady who has been a loving & giving person not only to myself but to her grandchildren.

This is a lady with so much pride & strength that sometimes I think she forgets that she has any.

This is a lady that looks at us with love as only mothers can.

…Yes we may have ‘words’ now and then…we are Mother & Daughter.

…Yes we may not often see eye to eye on things.

…Yes we are both different ..but in so many ways so alike .

…Yes you have grown older..but I have too.

…Yes I am proud of you, admire you, value you, adore you.

… Yes but most of all I AM THANKFUL that you are my MUM & I treasure now more than ever having you with me still..

So do not think for one moment that you aren’t beautiful because my darling English Rose YOU ARE NOW and always will be to me…

I LOVE YOU

xxxxxxxxx

Memories of Past – Yes more old photos..time to run

My Grandparents were English. The below is my Grandparents wedding day, I never got to meet my Grandfather. I was fortunate to meet my Grandmother when I was in England (when I was 18) but she sadly passed away whilst I was over there. I love the dresses and the stoic look on their faces. Obviously ‘one’ didn’t smile for the camera in those days.

then they did

I don’t have many photos of me as a child. Brother 1st born stole the limelight…no kidding he did..no I am kidding. When mum and dad came out to Australia they didn’t own a camera so a friend of theirs took most of the photos of him.. by the time I came along 2 years later, the friend had moved ..and well they still didn’t have a camera..    yes whose a little tubby – and pick me in the torn photo…

                                    

Pop **my dad** I love you

Please don’t tell mum you think that you’re dying – Mum told me today that’s what you said.

I don’t want to hear those words 

Don’t say you think your life’s at an end – those words cut to deep.

I watch you slowly find your balance when you stand & that a short walk makes you weary – I see the strength you once had is gone & I see the frustration in your eyes because of it.  I see the tremors in your hands which I know is hard for you to understand.

But I don’t want to hear those words

I see the changes in you, I see that my dad has grown older – don’t make me cry by saying what you did today.  I love my nick-name Ginger though I don’t know why I have it  – I love the bond we have which has grown stronger throughout the years.

But I don’t want to hear those words

I look at you & think of all our laughter & our tears – the advice you have imparted – the guidance that you have given – I’m your daughter “your girl” & I’m here for you – you know that…right? – I know this can’t be easy for you – growing old never is & I wish I could do more.

But I don’t want to hear those words

I love & cherish you so much & it hurts me to know those words were spoken – it frightens me of what will eventually come – but that time is not yet with us – so I can only ask that you try not to be disheartened or make apologies for your age,  for I will be your support,  be it just my hand to hold you steady or a hug to show how much I care.

But please I don’t want to hear those words

**Ginger**   xxxxx

My Dad – Affectionately ‘Pop’

For my Pop,

This is what I wrote & read to my father not so long ago.

For the last few months I have thought more and more about wanting to sit with you and say what I am about to. Instead I being the writer have written those words and will read it, as hopefully I shall find this easier.

What can a daughter say to her father, that I love you totally? Admire your courage to survive your upbringing, your strength to conquer against all odds your escape during the war. Your tenacity to fight for a better life, not only for yourself but for my mother and your children.

You are a man of dignity and honesty. You have been and still are a wonderful husband to mum and a truly devoted and loving father to your children. You have always been there to support and encourage and give me much-needed advice. You have been the disciplinarian when needed when I was younger, the confidant as I grew and the person I could rely on.

Every daughter will say their father is the best, but of you it is true. It is a pity we don’t ‘know’ the man before they became our father, as I would have liked to have known you in your youth, or a young man, but then again are you so different from then to now? As life rolls by I have so many memories of you and my life is the better for it. I would not change one moment, nor one day.

I have wanted to say these things to you for sometime and even though I pray with my entire being that you will be with me for many years to come, reality means that may not be so. This is why I say this to you now, because I do not want to miss the opportunity of not being able to tell you. I adore you Pop, you will always be with me on this earth or when your time comes to leave it. Perhaps believe in the ever after, so that I can still talk to you and know that you are around me. No words shall comfort my grief or pain when you are not here to talk to or laugh with. I shall remember playing childhood games with you, I shall remember sharing a loaf of bread and a full piece of salami in a car with you and not having anything to cut them with. Our memories will being a smile to my heart. I love you unconditionally and respect you as my father and as a human being.

You have brought me up well and taught me well and for that I am eternally grateful.

You are in my heart and so much a part of me, that tears well in my eyes as I write these words.

But I wanted to say them – had to say them. I am so proud to be your daughter and even more proud that you Pop are my father. So with this I close, I wipe the tears and I vow to spend as much time with you as I can. I love you.

I shared this with you, to implore those that may read it, to say what they feel to their parents, before the chance has been taken from you.  I did and I have made peace within myself, that when his time does come he will know my thoughts and how much I love him. I held his hand and struggled with the tears as I read this to him, but I had the opportunity to do so and for that I am happy.

Remember the lyrics to Mike and the Mechanics Song  The Living Years-

I wasn't there that morning
When my Father passed away
I didn't get to tell him
All the things I had to say