Live Your Dream – Tired, Grumpy and Happy all in the one day.

TIRED – Last night and into the wee small hours of this morning began the tossing of my body around the bed with my brain not switching off. I lay there “SLEEP” you idiot just SLEEP! How hard is it? You are tired, your eyes are closed but you know that, however you are looking from behind those closed lids and, hoping that your eye balls had another curtain you could just close shut and darkness prevail.

This went on till 4am before the alarm buzzed it’s merry tune at 6.15. 

GRUMPY – Up I struggled into the shower for the morning routine of getting ready for work. Today was a day I was dreading and also happy about. I was going to resign after 2 years. The day was a complete struggle – the deed was done in the afternoon – I told my boss. 

Homeward bound my stomach was still in knots. I have a new job – I shouldn’t be stressing so.

HAPPY – Finally after years of writing and presenting my Memoir to various Publishers (only to be knocked back – though I wrote with warmth, humour and from the heart they would say) I decided to hell with the vanity – self promote I say! After all I wrote my story not to get rich but to see that someone wanted to buy my story to read. Was interested in seeing what I had to say, read my words that I had painstakingly written and re written over and over again. To see my story on Amazon and Lulu (yes a self promoting plug) was truly amazing. Words cannot describe. I DID THAT!!!! 

So for all those that blog/post/scribble on note pads/type madly on their keyboards – I say live your dream – put it out there whatever way you can. We are writers, we are souls that want our readers to absorb our words no matter what forum we choose. I ended the day happy.

**My Memoir The Empty Nest A Mother’s Hidden Grief is now available through Amazon and Lulu (J M Kadane)**

I thank you

Bucket List

There comes a time in your life, mainly when you hit middle age (of course what number that may be is any one’s guess) for we don’t know when our time is up.

Goals in life that you wish to attain. We all have them, be large or small.

Mine were quite simple, and yet it took me sometime to actually get off my butt to start making them come to fruition.

To start off with I had various video recorder tapes. VHS for those who are too young to know what these are (the old big plastic cassettes) for the past few years I kept saying to myself I need to get them onto DVD’s, for over 28 years they sat in a plastic container in one of my cupboards, gradually the colour fading on them, lines and static appearing, all of this I know idea was happening. Last week I bundled up all these old memories, plus some more current and got them transposed onto discs. The technology wasn’t around years back to do, and now of course the Video Recorders have improved. It was one of those “Yes I’ll get around to it one day”. Now I have done it, so strike one off my list. I feel happy about this.

Secondly I have written a manuscript, I had sent it off to various publishers with favourable critique, but unfortunately it came to nought. Now I have taken the plunge to put as an EBook and I’m in the process of doing that.

I would like a wall of family photos, I haven’t started this venture. It’s the mere thought of getting all the ‘hard copy’ pics out and not having negatives of them (you say what’s a negative?) Taking them to the camera store to get them blown up, airbrushed etc etc. This causes me inner tension that I haven’t begun this.

To start blogging – as I enjoy writing so much, the chance to meet other bloggers or writers, to read their posts. Well clearly I can strike that off my list!

Mundane wants like new flooring, new bathroom, new splash back in the kitchen or a new bench top. New furniture, reconstruct the decking. These are dependent on finances more than anything though.

There are probably many more things I would like to achieve before I cant smell the roses, another overseas trip or two perhaps. To return to Europe and to show my partner all its the wonders.

I’ll keep dreaming, and planning in my head in the hope that I’ll get off said backside and make them come true.

**My Memoir The Empty Nest A Mother’s Hidden Grief is now available on Amazon and Lulu (J M Kadane)**