I had that inner and outer glow when a life grew inside me and felt small fists and kicks from tiny feet
I watched as my stomach jumped with an internal cricket beneath its skin
I cried at movies when there was no need and laughed for the same reason
I read books about to how to raise your kids, only to heed my inner voice
I dressed in clothes that had to stretch and donned unflattering 'tent's'
I wish now for T-Shirts that showed the world, I was to become a mum
I cringed with cramps from over-doing
I sulked at the sight of wine, that had to wait for another day, or the cigarette I couldn't have
I smiled at hands that wanted to feel the life within
I thought of names, only to decide after they were born, as the decision was at our first meeting
I felt the nurses as they probed to assess dilation
I squinted at fluorescent lights that shone brightly on my bared body in the room, without humiliation
I felt the pain as it hammered through me, time and time again and wondering if it would cease
I shuddered as I felt the needle in my back
I winced being told one more push, feeling the sweat trickle off my brow and hoped that this would end
BUT
I remember hearing a babies cry
I remember my tears letting go as she was given to me to hold ~ my cricket
I do remember becoming a mother for the first time
and I remember ~ as if it was only yesterday
©jmtacken Nov 2013
Ramblings From A Mum 