“You paid how much?”

The strains of Born to Be Wild blared through the open window.

“40 dollars on EBay”.

“You were so ripped off”.

“Don’t be stupid, it’s a bargain, have to work on it a bit, that’s all”.

“A little?  You are dreaming, look at the rust on the thing, where’s the engine”?

“Well clearly it doesn’t have one”.

“So that means you have to peddle it?”

“What’s wrong with peddling for goodness sake, it’s good exercise, I could do with it, my legs aren’t in the best of shape”.

“Mildred honey, you’re 89 years old, how do you think your legs should look?”

100 words or less for friday-fictioneers


Click here to visit more Friday Fictioners   This week’s photo by Sandra Cook

Close your eyes in case I offend…. Nah it’s not that bad….

Aussie Sayings…..

Thought I’d share just a ‘wee’ sample of some of our colourful sayings from down under.

Please remember that we all don’t talk like this on a regular basis or the ‘norm’ and they are to be read with the humour that us Aussies are known for.

Flat out like a lizard drinking =  hard work, busy. (But originally sarcastically)

Better than a poke in the eye with a burnt stick =  Be thankful for what you’ve got.

Lower than a snake’s armpit =  Pretty underhanded

As useful as an ashtray on a motorbike/water-ski/surf-board = useless

I feel like a dog’s breakfast = Feel pretty awful.

Fits like a bum in a bucket = cosy fit

Happy as a dog in a hub cap factory = really happy

He’s as full as a goog =  full, so drunk he can’t stand up

Thick as a lump of 4 X 2. (four by two) = not well endowed with grey matter

She goes like the clappers = Move fast

Left like a shag on a rock = result of unpopularity

A few dice short of Yahtzee = Not very intelligent 

Carrying on like a pork chop = over exited, hyperactive

As thick as two short planks! = Not too bright

He’s off like a bucket of prawns in the hot sun = I am out of here!

So do you have any you can share?