Parenting | Ramblings From A Mum

I forgot to do a ‘How my weekend was’, mind you I did not have enough to write about. Friday I spent the day at the penguins and did their weeding for 5 hours, yes my bum cheeks and thighs felt it Saturday.

Saturday afternoon, went to the ‘The Circle’ to watch the fledging mediums strut their stuff, unfortunately no one wanted to talk to me. Sunday? Um Sunday – scratches head – oh yes Sunday in the afternoon went for a demonstration of a Thermomix machine the whizz bang German made cutter, slicer, dicer, scales, cooker, bread & maker everything you can imagine all in one unit that does everything apart from brown the meat. At $2,000.00 a bargain…. no I did not buy one. I hardly cook these days and not working still thought better of it.

Remember the diamond I lost out of my ring, I didn’t have enough Insurance so they only could pay out $1,000 (the diamond was $2000) so sadly instead of putting it towards another gem, I will be using this money to help with the bills etc.

I did see a service last Monday with another Celebrant from the same company as the first one I saw. This one was a gentleman however. It was a bit eerie as the service was held in the same Chapel where Mr. S.’s mum had hers. I watched him ‘do his thing’ and although he spoke quite well, to me he was to business like, there was no emotion in what he said, though he paused at the right moments.

The positive that came out of this was that this time, I met the owner of the F.D Home. Mal, a lovely elderly gentlemen. He said Liz (the lady I first saw) I know I am testing memories here from previous posts, has been with them for years and she does generic services (I call that lazy). Greg has also been since the company started, so they have to give them priority. BUT (I know you can’t sentences with but) he said that his niece also did services but didn’t really want to do them anymore, so they have 2, but they could do with 3… and to keep in touch with his son who is now waiting for an appropriate (hopefully smooth sailing) funeral for me to conduct on trial.

So each day I sit and write, and visit the folks – oh yes, sorry, I haven’t really updated them have I. Dad is doing okay after his 3rd fall. We are off to see the Oncologist next week. We have to wait till the end of Nov for mums Geriatric assessment. We are in the process of getting the medical alerts pendants and also another assessment to how they are coping living in their home.

Pop is feeling weaker though, I went in yesterday and he was asleep at 10 (he wakes at 5) but normally doesn’t sleep till the afternoon. In fact sometimes when I am sitting there during the day he nods off in the chair at the kitchen table. Mum started crying, which got me going and he said he is feeling useless and weak.

Each day as it comes, that’s all I can get through and hope that he is with us for a long time to come.

Now just to brighten the mood a little…. Daughter # 2 has a onsey – I tried it on this morning for a giggle, so that you may too. Erm I’m a Unicorn in case you are wondering.

How brave am I with that Title!

Dislocating my shoulder from patting myself on the back…that’s how much.

No honestly I have read a few blogs (such a blagh word) posts..posts sounds much more dignified, of late and wanted to write the below.

This is Mumsy talking ..honest..straight from the heart …the gut…the soul…

Mums,Moms,mothers..no matter what word you use (now take a deep deep breath in) we are special, we are loving, we are caring, we are nurturing, we are protective, we are consoling, we are advises, we are taxi drivers, we are nurses, we are accountants, we are healers, we are protectors, we are hard task masters, we are insane, we are counsellors, we are time keepers, we are the carers, we are …well just mums.

No one prepares you for mother hood no matter how many books you may read, or what advice is imparted by family, relatives or friends. When I was having my 2nd, I pulled into the driveway to drop off daughter # 1 to be greeted by my mum who said “Hope it’s a boy”… Hmmph well I don’t really care at this point I just want IT OUT!!

You can take in all the advice (especially with your 1st) you absorb and then it’s up to you..plain and simple you are the one having said child.. you are the one that is going to go through unexplainable agony to deliver said child and you are the one to raise said child to the best of your ability.

Prior to having your lovely little one….

Do they tell you that you that in the throes of labour you will hate your other half for getting you into this mess in the first place? No

Do they tell you, even though you may decide on a drug free birth that the pain is so great you may simply relinquish all thoughts of not wanting to possibly inflict any drugs into your baby’s system for taking some? No

Do they tell you that you have to have an enema (why couldn’t I just have had prunes?) and a mini shave? (like OMG what is THAT all about) No

Do they tell you that you have to leave any embarrassment aside that you may feel about having your legs spread wide or in stirrups with bright neon lights shining onto your private bits? No

Do they tell you that you will squat, be on all fours, lay down, toss, turn, sit, pant, breathe heavy,cry? No

Do they tell you, you will feel like you are passing a watermelon and not a small baby? No

Do they tell you when your milk comes in day 3 or 4 that you turn into the devil incarnate? No

Do they tell you that relieving your sore and swollen “boobies” can only be helped by (a) standing under a hot shower (b) putting cabbage leaves across them (such elegance) or expressing? No

Do they tell you if you have had to have an episiotomy that the only cure is a salt bath and a whoopee cushion? No

Do they tell you that yes you may not be able to burp your baby and their lips may turn purple? No

Do they tell you it’s natural for you to run down to the nursery if baby isn’t in the same room with you to check on them every 2 minutes? No

Do they tell you that if your baby doesn’t sleep and you are rocking them, laying them along your arm, feeding them, burping them, laying them on your tummy and you will be so sleep deprived that you feel you want to throw them out the window? No

Do they tell you that they will test your patience, make you cry, make you scream, make you say “Why are you even here?? No

Do they tell you that their first bowel movements may make you gag? No

Do they tell you when you bath them that it is ok and you that you won’t accidentally drown them? No

Do they tell you when you want to cook the dinner that that is the time they will play up and cry and want attention? No

BUT SHOULD THEY TELL YOU

That you will go through the worst pain you have ever experienced in your entire life and be grateful that you did and you won’t remember it.

That you will look upon your newborn child with awe and amazement of how you created this tiny being?

That you will snuggle against your newborns skin and take in their baby smell and realise that is all you have ever wanted or needed in your life.

That you watch them feed and gaze at their sleepy eyes as they close sated with milk.

That you will listen to their first words and think they are the most brilliant child to be born.

That you will watch them take their first steps and be warm,fuzzy and proud inside.

That you will heal their wounds and band aid their cuts when they fall.

That you will treasure the moment they bring home their first piece of art work from kinder and school.

That you will be so excited for them when they have met a friend.

That you will be the shoulder they need to cry on when they have been hurt by someone.

That you will be there to help and guide and protect and nurture them for as long as you live.

That yes there will be testing times and angry times and frustrating times but it’s all part of being a mum.

That you think being a mum for all it’s trials and tribulations is what you have wanted more than anything else in this world.

That the love you feel for them is insurmountable.

That you would lay your life down for them.

Yes that is what is being a mother is all about…here for the long haul through thick and through thin, to encourage, to help, to guide, to mentor, to love.. and truly…I am so happy to be a mum..happy to have these (now adult girls) who will always be ‘my babies’. Proud of their accomplishments and yes can acknowledge their failures or have doubts about how they live their lives. BUT still… seeing a part of me in them for better or worse and being individuals and simply just them being them makes me proud.

Yes they may take a wrong turn, make decisions you aren’t happy with but it’s all part of growing up and they are learning as you continually do.

Embrace your role …I have…I will continue to do so…sometimes it’s difficult, sometimes you want to pull your hair out, sometimes you scream and rant and rave at things they have done…but they are your creation. They are part of you and for me, my 2 daughters are … well…. two human beings that I couldn’t and wouldn’t ever want not be in my life.

I am in awe of them..now and always.