I am the stone

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My spirits in the stone you hold
Warm it for a while, before I’m
cast in to the coolness of the lake
say your goodbyes
your peace with me
as I return to earth

As you let go into the stillness
remember the first ripples that you see
they belong to you, my love
the closet that is to me
for you I’ve loved and
have been loved in return

You are the one I fear for most
your pain will be felt most
the ripples continue outwards
belonging to family
beyond the eddies the circles wide
are for my life long friends

The water runs deep
I sink slowly to rest
along the sands below
beneath the cool
the ripples will subside
as must your pain

When all you see is the sunset
and no more sight of ‘me’
I will return to those I’ve loved
I still have breath to breathe

Copyright JMTacken 13.1.2015

Post Christmas day and Boxing Day chat

Oh where did those 2 days disappear?

Firstly a thank you to all who read and also commented on my pre Christmas chat. I hope that you all had a wonderful day with those you love and possibly those you may not (depending on the family/friend relationships that were gathered at your table).

Our Boxing Day is drawing to an end with another day of good food and good company.

Yesterday we went to my brothers for lunch I’m driving as Mr. S with his ‘boot’ cannot. Picked up Mr. S’s stepfather P and then daughter B and her husband E (sorry possibly confusing you with all these letters).

Arriving and organising the entree (fresh prawns cooked in chilli & sesame oil) with home made garlic mayonnaise, a roasted capsicum and Thai dipping sauces.

The rest of the family arrived brother P after picking up Mumma & Pop Penguin, nephews D his wife D and S and his wife E and their new babies Mia and Charlize.

K then entered without J…but she was calm and seemed relaxed.

Highlights of the day

The food, prawns, glazed BBQ leg of ham and turkey, salads.
Desserts of small puddings or individual trifles, with cream, custard, puréed rhubarb, meringue and home made shortbread.

The Kris Kringle gift giving, where we were given numbers, taking it in turns to choose a generic gift, then having the opportunity to steal what we preferred from someone else (mumma p got grumpy when her baileys Irish cream liquer vanished)

Playing darts outside with all the boys in the family.
This also included garden darts…trying to spear a leaf across the lawn, from over our heads, blindfolded, between our legs.

Taking family photos, pulling silly faces and crazy positions.

Cuddling the two babies and being able to settle them and get them sleeping (haven’t lost the knack it seems)

Receiving a weekend get-a-way with Mr.S in February in Victoria (destination unknown) & a Fitbit (a watch that tells you calories burned, sleep patterns etc)

Best highlight

Watching my girls K and B talking and son in law E.
Watching them laugh and share and K joining in the day.

and in the in betweens

Mumma P getting cranky that no one was singing carols, throughout the conversations held at the table.

Pop feeling useless that he had to be helped to walk and be seated.

Lowlights

We forgot to buy Bon Bons and sit with our silly paper hats!

I hope you had an amazing two days.
So what were your highlights and in-betweens, if you’d like to share?

Final Orchestra (Prose)

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Swallow me whole ~ symphony of thunderstorms
break the sky with snare drums
the utterance of the approaching squall
cymbals illuminate clouds of darkness
piccolos the shooting stars
that beckons us to other lands

Let me ride ~ the crest of cellos
rain filled, before they burst
tempting parched and broken ground
when my time comes I’ll rest ‘neath harps
tranquil in the angels hands and
eyes will close to the refrain of violins

©jmtacken Jan 2014

hopefully my poetic muse is finding her way back home

Street lamps and freedom of thought (Prose)

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take me away, a walk at night
down tarred streets
under subtle street lamp glows
where dancing moths swirl
randomly in the breeze
breathe essences of flowers, with closed eyes
drawing scents underneath my skin
perfumes greater found in nature
as are moments, we remember
on summer nights with hands clasped tight
resting a head upon your arm

for there are times when escape is deemed
the necessary, to unfurl our minds in
beads of warm night air
to let our minds run free
from knots that bind inside our ribs
that lead to trepidation
when it’s simply our over thinking
of the ‘what could be’
and can we stop the process
only if and when we choose
a walk on balmy nights
helps to free my worries loose

©jmtacken 16/11/2013

The Escape – Fiction

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Photo Credit – http://io9.com/iconic-black-and-white-photographs-colorized-911645264

I PLunged into clear;  whilst murky
slept beneath avoiding
air bubbled skin
bring boats;  navigate the coast
in search of me;  my thoughts
you won’t recover
yet I fear not
breath in my lungs
will expire soon, my last
farewell to life and loves
that I have known

yet there is peace floating
bathed;  nudged in silence like your hand
in darkness across a wavy bed
for our fingers never held in love
Strike would find its way ~ as waves
CraSH towards the shore in search
of rest;  the current pulled them back
as I with you returned for
insults;  punishment

with one last look water veiled
plastic upon my skin; arms braced
I still shield myself from you
let the water gently fill my eyes
as I fear not
I shall escape into the darkness
into the sea of graves as others
have before me, indeed a privilege
of the life you found unworthy

and as I rest upon the sand
shards of light flirting with my skin
fish that pick my bones
there is freedom
no fight ~ no breath ~ no hate ~
I fear not
the TORment of you will disappear
the abyss will have swallowed me
and left you ~ a hatred memory

©JMTacken2013

Shared with dVerse for Open Link Wednesday (posted Wednesday my time)

Christmas Shopping the thrill of it all…..

The silly Season has begun in earnest, cars driving around shopping centre car-parks bustling for pole position.

I lie in wait (well not really lying as that’s hard to do if you’re driving) waiting for a weary, frazzled shopper laden with bags to return to their car. If they can find it that is. Then it’s time to pounce like a lion stalking their prey.

Rally driving skills (not that I have any) come into play.

Like a mad man woman possessed I hit the accelerator, ducking and weaving other weary shoppers, like I am driving a dodgem car and pull up behind the unsuspecting victim (weary shopper laden with bags) and wait for them to pack their goodies into their boot.

Then casually as if the good car parking fairy had designated this very spot for me alone, I take my place.

  • Yes I will get flustered.
  • Yes I will think how hard is it to find a car-park?
  • Yes I will curse under my breath and out loud that I hate Christmas shopping.

It’s all meant to be peaceful, serene, good will to men isn’t it??

No it’s every man woman for themselves out there in the car- park battle for supremacy.

To think the ‘fun’ has only just begun..

I wish you well oh fellow shoppers, in your quest to find your spot. I wish you peaceful shopping expeditions, where you’re not jostling amongst a thousand other stressed out adults and children, wishing that they had stayed at home.

I hope that you can park your car without having to lurk and to show good manners and grace when a driver cuts you off or pinches YOUR spot.

I tried to start shopping early before the frenzy and crowds overtook the centres, but it seems early is never early enough!

May The Force be With You

Need I say more.. Courtesy Google & gladstoneobserver.com.au

My Dad – Affectionately ‘Pop’

For my Pop,

This is what I wrote & read to my father not so long ago.

For the last few months I have thought more and more about wanting to sit with you and say what I am about to. Instead I being the writer have written those words and will read it, as hopefully I shall find this easier.

What can a daughter say to her father, that I love you totally? Admire your courage to survive your upbringing, your strength to conquer against all odds your escape during the war. Your tenacity to fight for a better life, not only for yourself but for my mother and your children.

You are a man of dignity and honesty. You have been and still are a wonderful husband to mum and a truly devoted and loving father to your children. You have always been there to support and encourage and give me much-needed advice. You have been the disciplinarian when needed when I was younger, the confidant as I grew and the person I could rely on.

Every daughter will say their father is the best, but of you it is true. It is a pity we don’t ‘know’ the man before they became our father, as I would have liked to have known you in your youth, or a young man, but then again are you so different from then to now? As life rolls by I have so many memories of you and my life is the better for it. I would not change one moment, nor one day.

I have wanted to say these things to you for sometime and even though I pray with my entire being that you will be with me for many years to come, reality means that may not be so. This is why I say this to you now, because I do not want to miss the opportunity of not being able to tell you. I adore you Pop, you will always be with me on this earth or when your time comes to leave it. Perhaps believe in the ever after, so that I can still talk to you and know that you are around me. No words shall comfort my grief or pain when you are not here to talk to or laugh with. I shall remember playing childhood games with you, I shall remember sharing a loaf of bread and a full piece of salami in a car with you and not having anything to cut them with. Our memories will being a smile to my heart. I love you unconditionally and respect you as my father and as a human being.

You have brought me up well and taught me well and for that I am eternally grateful.

You are in my heart and so much a part of me, that tears well in my eyes as I write these words.

But I wanted to say them – had to say them. I am so proud to be your daughter and even more proud that you Pop are my father. So with this I close, I wipe the tears and I vow to spend as much time with you as I can. I love you.

I shared this with you, to implore those that may read it, to say what they feel to their parents, before the chance has been taken from you.  I did and I have made peace within myself, that when his time does come he will know my thoughts and how much I love him. I held his hand and struggled with the tears as I read this to him, but I had the opportunity to do so and for that I am happy.

Remember the lyrics to Mike and the Mechanics Song  The Living Years-

I wasn't there that morning
When my Father passed away
I didn't get to tell him
All the things I had to say