I touched your cheek

M_0010_Butterfly

I visited
entered through the open window
where the cream broderie tablecloth
still hugged the oak table
this is where our glasses clinked
I left inprints cross the dust
along the dresser shelf
music filled the air

I went inside
the curtains gently blew
I touched the books you loved
they sat next to the albums
that captured our lives
and there you were
walking from the other room
I watched you take my ashes
sit in your favourite chair

I heard you gulp
your adams apple rose and fell
you wiped your eyes
I couldn’t help
I couldn’t cry
you looked at me
curious how I got here
my wings touched your cheek
I’ll be back again

Copyright JMTacken 8.11.2014
Photograph mine

Life after…

Hello everyone,

I haven’t written about my meetings since 25th May. Last Saturday night I attended a ‘meeting’ that included 10 or so friends and acquaintances of Carol (Head Medium). The ‘fledging mediums’ were having a chance to ‘strut their stuff’ i.e. get up in front of strangers and not just the group that they have become familiar with.

I was holding my brother’s scarf and a leather necklet, I also carried a photo of him in my bag. One of the ladies ‘H’ got up to do a reading. Bear in mind I have NOT mentioned anything about my brother to her or anyone in the group, please keep this in mind as you roll your eyes.

She said I have a male energy drawing close – on a brother or brother-in -law vibration.

I sat – tensed.

He did not pass of old bones (my brother was 47 when he passed).

I also feel that he had an illness but that he did not pass over from the earth plain from this illness (My brother had Hepatitis C, he was also told because of liver, that if he drank again, it would kill him).

He did not have a regular job as such, I get the feeling that he drifted in different things regarding work (my brother was a hippie till the end, he went to India a few times to purchase incense and jumpers to sell back in Australia, but did not maintain or hold a regular job).

He feels sorry for the grief he caused for your family and I feel more so for your parents (mum and dad found it difficult to accept the life path that he chose, not settling into the mainstream and there were many clashes).

Something substantial about midnight, that he had everything he could have wanted in life, but at midnight it was taken away from him. (My family do not know the time that he passed, he was found on the floor of his Hotel room in India, approximately a week after his death. The death notice 9/1/2004. He also went to India taking a ‘lady’ friend with him, she ended up running off with a Taxi driver on New Years Eve).

He is very quiet, but as he draws his energy away he leaves me with a memory of a park with playground equipment and a river, where he spent time with the family when he was young (a park that us as a family went to and had BBQ’s or picnics regularly, it had a playground and also a small river running through it).

That is what threw me the most, the fact that Mr. S and I had driven past this park not that many weeks ago and I mentioned to him that is where we use to go as a family and had good memories of.

My brother ‘P’ was acknowledging that I had remembered the park.

The tears were flowing, a girlfriend next to me held my hand. Her grandmother (on her mother’s side) came through, she has been contacted twice before. I couldn’t stop crying.

Take it for what it is, ‘H’ did not know anything of my brother, yet what she spoke of was the truth.

Could it have been applied to anyone? If they died young, didn’t hold down a regular 9-5 job,passed by something that wasn’t due to the condition that he had, caused anxiety especially to their parents for the particular life-choices they made, did he pass NYE – ie his life was full then everything taken away at midnight, and went to a park similar to what we did.

I leave it to you to decide, for me the acknowledgment of life after death is becoming more and more real to me as the weeks progress.

I will share more as time goes on.

I thank you.

Time to say goodbye

awake
in darkness
time
unknown

eye-lids heavy
senses not
awakened

but I see you
at the end of
my bed

wake my body
wake my mind
am I dreaming

I will not
accept
death

you are here
we do have
today
tomorrow
the day
after

have you really
been taken
from me

your silhouette
shimmers
before me
unmoving

only
outstretched
hand

elegiac
I am not
scared

I smile
whispery tears
fall
from my eyes
and touch my cheeks

has life been
so cruel
to take you away
to leave me
alone

have you gone?

you gaze
upon me
blurred
yet
translucent

real

smiling
reaching out

if I rise
come to you
will my body
liquefy
into yours

I want to reach out
touch my finger tips
to yours once more

where shall
you take me

are you asking
me to be with you
for eternity

to be cradled
in your arms
as before

I shall
join your
shadow in the
darkness
of early morn

my stomach knots
I do not fight

your strength is
what
I need

make contact
let me feel
your touch

my life is
nothing without
you

I will join you
I shall melt
into the image
I see before me

I shall once more
hear your voice
feel your soft breath
against
my brow

I will join you
don’t fade
wait for me

wait